Saturday, January 29, 2011

My response to a piece on Race & Attraction

Hey Masir

No idea if you are involved in the PUA community but would like to hear your comments on this article written by PUA "Roosh" on his popular website, this guy written a few books like 'Bang' if you've heard of that one.

Anyways he talks in this article about the 'totem pole of racial attractiveness' in he writes which goes like this for men:

"Let’s start with the ranking for men, from most desirable to least desirable. If you placed a handsome representative from each category in a lineup and let the world’s women pick their favorite, here’s who would get the most votes:

  1. European men with darker, sultry features from countries like Spain, Italy, Portugal, and France
  2. Northern European men with light features from countries like Denmark, Sweden, Finland, Netherlands, and Norway
  3. Western men with medium features from countries like England, United States, Australia, Canada, and Ireland
  4. Middle Eastern men with darker but slightly rougher features from countries like Turkey, Greece, Morocco, Iran, and Algeria
  5. Latino men from countries like Ecuador, Peru, Bolivia, and ones in Central America
  6. Arab men from countries like Egypt, Saudi Arabia, Jordan
  7. African men
  8. Southeast Asian men from countries like Thailand, Philippines, Indonesia
  9. Indian men
  10. Asian men from countries like Korea, China, Taiwan

and for women

How about if we did the list for women? It’d be similar to the mens list but with a couple changes:
  1. Northern European women (+1 movement)
  2. European women (-1)
  3. Western women (no change)
  4. Latina women (+1)
  5. Middle Eastern women (-1)
  6. Southeast Asian women (+2)
  7. Asian women (+3)
  8. Arab women (-2)
  9. Indian women (no change)
  10. African women (-3)

Mentions Asians here:

"why are Asian women viewed more favorably than their male counterparts? It’s because they are seen as submissive and compliant, qualities that make for a good partner. Plus Asian genetic features are more pleasing on the feminine form. And how about African-American women—do they see a boost like with African-American men? I don’t see that. Media portrayals have not been kind to them—they are shown to be combative and promiscuous. There are some exceptions to their perception (Ethiopian women fare rather well in being desired by men), but unless the African girl has a shade like Halle Berry or Tyra Banks, she will have trouble competing with other women higher on the list."

Anyway that was pretty brief compared to the whole article

Am very interested to hear your viewpoint on this

This email landed in my inbox not too long ago. I was hesitant on writing up a piece on it, but I decided to do it just to reiterate that this topic is seriously getting old. In fact, I'm probably doing a disservice to the Asian-American community by revisiting it so I will apologize in advance. The funny thing is, I'm not even annoyed by it as much as I am amazed at how people out there are relentlessly in pursuit of marginalizing entire ethnic groups whether it be Asians, Blacks, Mexicans, etc. 

Let me make one thing clear. Asian-American men are not at a disadvantage in the dating game, period. There was a point in time where I had this twisted view of the world where I believe that they did. Truth is, its all relative. If you think you're at a disadvantage, well guess what? You will reflect that kind of mindset and persona in your demeanor which will make you look very insecure which is an invariable formula for failure. I've undergone an enormous transformation within the last 6 months and looking back at my previous blogs and commentary on other sites its actually quite embarrassing to say the least. 

Just to prove my point, I was in Virginia not too long ago and saw tons of hot AFs with AMs. Let me put that shit in bold...HOT ASIAN WOMEN with ASIAN MEN. Some of the guys these women were with were good-lookin' dudes, but I also saw others who were with women I believed to be out of their league. So what could it be? Well, it could have meant several things. 1) The guy has serious G-A-M-E and a kick-ass personality. 2) The guy has serious money. 3) It was completely serendipitous. Whatever the reason, it didn't really matter because they were with their Asian Queens and other guys were jockin' with jealousy. All in all, it made me proud and it also reinforced the notion that I must continue to take responsibility for my own unhappiness in the dating world (not that I'm saying I'm unhappy because I'm the happiest and most confident I've ever been to be absolutely sincere).

Oh yeah and last time I checked, Korean guys in substantial numbers, are sought after in many parts of the world.  


  1. All things being equal, minorities are at a certain disadvantage unless you're dating within your own culture. That is irrefutable fact.

    On the other hand, there is always going to be a subset of women who are open minded or have a preference for a certain ethnicity/race.

    I'm not saying to become obsessed and downtrodden by any unfair disadvantage. Rather, acknowledge there's some bullshit, and find ways to deal with it positively and get around it.

    Maybe it's just me, but I feel awesome knowing that I'm succeeding despite the fact that the game is rigged against guys like me. I've overcome, and it just feels great.

  2. to the above poster...bro i salute you

  3. I 2nd that salute. Keep at it. I recently picked up a girl at IKEA just by starting small talk. You have to try. That's the first step and you can't let the, "Oh I don't have any confidence" or "I'm not good looking enough" or even worse, "I'm Asian" attitude prevent you from making first contact.

    I'm sure you've heard this saying by Michael Jordan before but I'll state it again. "You miss 100% of the shots that you don't take."


Free your mind. The rest will your fingers.