Now maybe I'm supposed to be in complete shock and dismay, but its not all that surprising if you think about it. Go ahead and yap all you want about the different statistical methods of slicing, dicing and presenting the data to bias the results, but before you disparage Hahm's findings save your breath and do three things for me first,
- Take a stroll down the block and count how many Asian Female/White Male couples there are as opposed to AM/WF couples (this works even better if you're in California or NYC by the way).
- Go to Craigslist and look under the Personals section and see how many SAFs are seeking out SWMs and vice versa. I guarantee the scale is tipped more so in one direction.
- Take a trip to Japan, China or any Asian country for that matter and perform 1 & 2. In this case, you can interchange White with Black as well.
Hahm also discovered that "Asian American women had a higher prevalence of STDs than White women in both 1995 (10.4% vs. 7.7) and 2001 (13.5% vs. 8.3%). The incidence of STDs (not diagnosed with STDs in 1995, but developed STIs in 2001) among Asian American women was also higher than that of White women." I know all of you AFs out there aren't easy, but this is some damning evidence when compared with White women. Incorporating these findings with AFs being 4x more likely to have an STD and it really begins to beg the question.
I don't mean to lambast all of you AA ladies, but try practicing responsible, safer sex by wrapping it up and slowing it down before you either catch a reputation as being an easy lay or something even worse!
I don't really see how this shows that Asian women are easy. At the most it shows that they are not assertive when it comes to insisting that their partner use protection.
ReplyDeleteA...
Good point. Protection does mitigate the risk of contracting an STD, but it doesn't eliminate it completely either. I think it is a combination of the two. Less Protection + More Sex. Hence my suggestion of "wrapping it up and slowing it down".
ReplyDeleteRegardless, I still hear plenty of talk from non-Asian guys how AFs are so easy while bashing AM. Of course I've denied it, rejected it and simply ignored it at times, but the data isn't helping my cause unfortunately.
“Condom use is hard in a culture where women are raised to be accommodating and polite.”
ReplyDeleteSo are we saying Asian women are polite whores?
She stated, “Asian and Pacific Islander women also have broader interracial dating patterns than Asian American men. This might explain why these women are exposed to higher rates of STDs.”
So is she saying non-Asian men are disease ridden pussbags?
There are a lot unanswered questions about this study, like:
What's the breakdown of the ethnicities within the Asian group?
Where did they get these women?
How did the different ethnicities of men compare?
Nevertheless the study paints AF's in a pretty bad light when there's already a stereotype of them being SOW's.
AF's keep bitchin' about the sexual stereotypes imposed on them. Well, quit being a fucking cliche then.
You brought some good quotes that I overlooked James.
ReplyDeleteI think being a polite whore is what they're saying! But remember, these are Asian AMERICAN women so as far as I'm concerned, they've all been raised to USE PROTECTION. Even if your parents don't discuss the topic of practicing safe sex, you still learn it in health class to wrap that shit up. Its not like AIDs, herpes, the clap and gonorrhea are obscure and unknown diseases.
The fact that she acknowledges Asian and Pacific Islander women having broader interracial dating patterns simply fuels my argument - AFs are willing to open their legs more often for a non-Asian guy as opposed to their own ethnic counterparts who are CLEANER. Probably the cleanest when compared against all other ethnic males.
"Condom use is hard in a culture where women are raised to be accommodating and polite.”
ReplyDeleteSo are we saying Asian women are polite whores?
No, what she's saying is that Asian men may be responsible for the Asian women not practising safe sex - of course. Sad.
A...
No, what she's saying is that Asian men may be responsible for the Asian women not practising safe sex - of course. Sad.
ReplyDeleteI'm not following you, Anonymous.
How are Asian men responsible for what Asian women are doing as consenting adults with non-Asian men?
Great post, Masir. I should've commented earlier, but I felt like I'd be echoing some of your sentiments a bit. However, I do find that AFs overseas are much easier than the ones in the states, especially when it comes to one-nighters. That's just from a servicemember's standpoint.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous is right. When it comes to how Asian women think, it always goes back to -- indirectly, "politely" or whatever -- blaming their Asian counterparts. (I'm using "Asian" generically, fyi, to mean both Asian American and Asians in Asia.)
ReplyDeleteBy Asian women dating non-Asian men, the good professor is asking why Asian men don't step up and start dating their lovely sisters.
The answer, of course, is that we planted those Asian women to give all the non-Asian men some nasty-ass STDs. After, of course, we gave it to them.
"I'm not following you, Anonymous.
ReplyDeleteHow are Asian men responsible for what Asian women are doing as consenting adults with non-Asian men?"
Well, by saying........"Condom use is hard in a culture where women are raised to be accommodating and polite.”....she's basically saying that Asian women's lack of assertiveness when it comes to insisting on safe sex with non-Asian men, may result from their being taught subservience in their own cultures. In other words, the Asian patriarchy is to blame - or, simply, Asian men are the culprits.
I'm not saying that I agree with this, I don't, but that's what I took Hahm's statement to mean. Of course I may be reading more into that statement than Hahm intended but I don't think so.
A...
I haven't seen the statistics, but I believe condom usage isn't as prevalent in Asia as it is in America. Does this mean they're more accommodating? Possibly, or they're just used to having unprotected sex because only until recently did STDs become a major concern for them. Its probable that such mannerisms are passed down to 2nd generation Asian Americans, but once again, they're NOT Asians. They're Americans. This is difference which shouldn't be simply overlooked or disregarded.
ReplyDeleteHahm should try to conduct the same STD research comparing Asian women vs men in ASIA. This is quite a daunting task given the size, density and number of countries in Asia itself, but if it turn out the Asian female and male STD count is proportionally similar, the data will serve as a proof point that our Asian-American sistas are given up the punani to non-Asian men in much larger numbers than their own kind.
So the next time I start gaming an Asian American girl and she gives me this myopic "I only date white guys" response, I am going to verbally slam the bitch.
"Oh that's cool. I only date girls that are STD free."
First of all, if the prevalence of STD's is 13.5% for Asian women, that means 86.5% of Asian women are free of STD's. So that's a great way to generalize ALL Asian women as having STD's when the statistics only reflect a minority. Secondly, how do you know STD's reflect promiscuous behaviors? It only takes ONE STD-infected partner for a woman to contract a STD. And for some STD's like AIDS, they are much easier for men to give to women than vice versa. How do you know men are not giving it to their wives after having affairs with other women? You can't assume such behaviors from the statistics, except to say that Asian women had sex or did drugs or got the STD in some way. So I am guessing you will say that it shows that Asian women have more sex than white women? Please, leave the analysis to the experts.
ReplyDeleteThe whole point of this article is an excuse for you to bash Asian women for dating non-Asian men. You're just projecting your own anxieties about dating on to them as if they were the reason you could not get a date. A few Asian women dating non-Asian men does not hinder your ability to find a woman. And what makes you think that they would date you if they were open to dating an Asian man? Don't flatter yourself.
The reason it is easier for Asian women is because they are better able to fit in with Western expectations of beauty and behavior. The traditional minded Asian men are what keep the numbers skewed. It is much easier for a traditional minded Asian woman to find a mate because they do not demand more than white women. Traditional Asian men demand more of their mates than white women are used to, so that gets in the way. You don't have to date the whole Asian female population. You just need to find a few Asian woman to date in your lifetime. Blaming a few Asian women for not finding that is just an excuse.
You need to read more carefully. The article said that Asian women were four times more likely than Asian men to have an STD. NOT white women. What makes you think it's not Asian men who are whoring themselves out giving STD's to Asian women? It only takes one partner to get an STD.
ReplyDeleteYou were actually winning me over until you dropped this line on me jstele.
ReplyDeleteA few Asian women dating non-Asian men does not hinder your ability to find a woman.
Did I read this correctly? A FEW?!? Two or three. That's it?!? Have you been living with Alice in Wonderland or in solitude the last decade? Why do you think there are so many AA guys out there who "bash Asian women for dating non-Asian men"? There's a reason why its a reoccurring topic of discussion, and its not because we're flat out racists. Its the ubiquitousness of it everywhere we go: on the street, in a restaurant, online, in the club, at work, on television, in movies and just about every other aspect of American society. That is more than just a few.
Call me a bitter disgruntled Asian guy all you want. YES. I AM at the moment because I care about my AA brothers and it pains me to hear women like you in denial of the gross discrepancy running rampant in America. You have no idea what it feels like to be psychologically castrated and robbed of your own manhood from being obliterated with negative stereotypes and racism since you were 4 years old. If you did, maybe you would actually understand our plight. People talk about having an identity crisis living in America because they're not White. Well AA men have been enduring their own identity crisis that is orders of magnitude worse - having their male gender identity stripped from them. How do you think an AA guy feels when he sees this gross imbalance of interracial couples complimented with Hahm's findings?
My traditional Asian parents, and surely many others, taught me to stay silent and ignore such disturbances. Look how much that's helped us progress toward racial-gender equality for us.
The whole "bitter Asian man" meme is a tired alibi that certain people use to avoid addressing the reality that Asian American sexuality has in many ways been fundamentally warped by the deeply racist country that is America.
ReplyDeleteFor Asian women, it is their exoticization and hypersexualization.
For Asian men, it is their emasculation and asexualization.
These are but two sides of the same coin.
No amount of "Love is Colorblind" Kool-Aid can hide this ugly reality.
Well, maybe it seems like a lot because that's all you ever focus on. It's like the insecure girl who keeps staring at her nose and only her nose. It just keeps getting bigger and bigger in her mind. Yes, there are way more AF/WM couples than vice versa, but nowhere near as much as the whiners complain. All my friends and family that are Asian women in the states or abroad only date men of their ethnicity, not even all Asian men. To say that WM/AF couples outnumber Asian couples in ASIA is just ridiculous when there aren't even that many white people in Asia. It's all just a projection of insecurity. The number is always going to be higher for AF interracial dating due to traditional Asian men and how incompatible they are with white women. If you have game, you have game. You should not be looking at AF/WM couples, but ALL couples that involve an Asian female and then, you will have a true sense of how widespread interracial dating is for Asian women. Even if the number was 90% of Asian women dating interracially, which is a great exaggeration, you don't need to date 90% of Asian women. Just because people date other races doesn't mean they don't date their own.
ReplyDelete@Lxy,
ReplyDeleteI don't understand your post. A tired alibi or not, that's exactly the reason why there's a bitter sentiment that's brewing. Its not just some postulated cultural idea that is being transmitted from one mind to the next from some reading or hearsay, but is based on real-life frequent occurrences. I never despised interracial couples from the get go. I always embraced them and found it intriguing until I got to college and began noticing an inequitable trend.
There are indeed two sides of the same coin of this racism.
One side of the coin as jstele mentions is highly praised for its appeal to western expectations of beauty, behavior and exoticness. The result? Your racial-gender is favorably sought after placing you on top of the social and dating ladder.
Now let's flip the coin.
I guess my friends and their friends are weird. Just go to an Asian church/community group and see how many Asian women are dating interracially. Maybe you see 15 AF/WM couples a day. But for every 15, there are probably a 100 Asian couples that you don't see. Your experience is not necessarily a reflection of what is out there in the real world. Just like a stripper's experience is not necessarily representative of all men.
ReplyDelete@jstele
ReplyDeleteFair enough. After rereading my original post I realized I made some hasty generalizations and took some cognitive shortcuts based on my tunnel vision. You have a case, but so do I. According to Hahm's research something is definitely up.
As I stated before, this is not something that I can merely not focus on when its become so pervasive which is not unique to my experiences exclusively. You can arguably discount this as being nothing more than another AA guy pitching a bitch, but its much easier to do so when you're on the beneficiary side of the equation. I'm not going to pretend like it doesn't bother me and stay silent forever. Been there. Done that. Doesn't work.
Nevertheless, I will still work on myself and sincerely try to eradicate such insecurities that are subliminally stuck to change for the better. Its a work in progress and I still have a ways to go, but this is the year where I force my emotionally constipated intestines to finally excrete the bullshit out completely.
Couple additional points.
ReplyDeleteI never said the AF/WM couples outnumber AF/AM in Asia nor am I necessarily referring to the traditional Asian male either.
Despite how this reads online, I do have game. You may not believe it. Oh well if you don't, but I am not the one to have extreme difficulty with picking up, dating or sleeping with a woman. Frankly, its not even about that.
Once again, its about AA camaraderie - the brotherhood - and being fed up with our manhood getting called into question. Lastly, as much as there are AFs out there who reject our so-called "traditional" ways while bending over backwards to reinforce their "exoticness" to WMs, there are AA women who see through the bullshit and choose to stick by us through our trials and tribulations such as this woman. I respect all of you very much.
P.S. Thank you for your comments.
@ jstele
ReplyDeleteI think that it is Hahm that is suggesting higher rates of Asian females dating out as a possible causation factor ......
“Asian and Pacific Islander women also have broader interracial dating patterns than Asian American men. This might explain why these women are exposed to higher rates of STDs.”
She also states that..........
"Condom use is hard in a culture where women are raised to be accommodating and polite.”
This is problematic for Asian-American Feminism because a significant argument for Asian female empowerment is that they can date whomsoever they choose because it's their bodies (I agree with this). Dating out has become a statement of empowerment, rejection of subservience to Asian men (The Patriarchy!) and somewhat of a symbol of the modern Asian-American woman.
If the correlation of out-dating proves to be a causative factor, then the feminist argument for empowerment through out-dating is obviously fallacious, since Asian women that don't seem to be empowered enough to insist on condom use. Even worse, Hahm seems to be suggesting that Asian men are still responsible for the lack of assertiveness of these supposedly empowered women.
A...
@ MaSir Jones
ReplyDeleteRead my post more carefully.
I was not criticizing you.
I was criticizing people who accuse Asian guys of being "bitter" over the IR dating issue and who correctly bring up issues of racism and White beauty standards.
@Lxy: Reread and point taken. I was a bit confused when I read it.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the clarification.
Maybe you see 15 AF/WM couples a day. But for every 15, there are probably a 100 Asian couples that you don't see.
ReplyDelete15 is actually quite a substantial amount. Think about the statistical implications in terms of different contexts. Consider the following:
-Out of 15 AF/WM couples you encounter per day, you will be lucky if you see A SINGLE WF/AM that same day. That's 15 times or 1500% more couples you see heavily tipped to one-side of the scale. Definitely an imbalance in the force and not bi-directional.
-15 AF/WM out of 100 AA couples = 15/100 = 15%. The current unemployment rate is 10% and we already see what kind of havoc this has wreaked on the average American. Now imagine if it were 15%. America would've already passed the threshold recession into a depression.
-When playing blackjack, the house only needs to gain a 2% edge over the player to make be profitable. If they had 15% edge over players, EVEN IF they were counting cards they'd still lose over the long run.
-Asians only make up 13.5% of California's total population, yet everyone who visits from other parts of the US speak about how the state has SO MANY Asian people. Even Dave Chappelle cracked jokes about this.
Please don't try to downplay its statistical significance. ^_^
Keep arguing for your limitations.
ReplyDelete@ Anonymous
ReplyDeleteGood arg. Did you read the article from Pyke and Johnson? I'm going to allude to it, because including Hahm's assertions, I also find it peculiar how many AA women feel like they are empowering themselves by,
1. Condemning AA men because we are considered too traditional and expect our AA counterparts to be subservient. In contrast, they will fulfill this stereotypical role for WM.
2. If they do not succumb to this submissive behavioral display for WM, then they argue WM give them this freedom of expression whereas AA men wouldn't even dare to. Who the heck said we wouldn't? Why is the White mainstream's femininity glorified and predisposed as righteous anyway?
3. Chastising dissenters while distilling our arguments down to simply whining, complaining or having serious character limitations. I can't imagine someone saying that to Malcolm and Martin.
@jstele
How should we combat our limitations (since guys like me are Game deficient and just "projecting our insecurities" by bashing AF/WM)?
Should AA men just remain the silent and submissive gender minority when it comes to this topic?
I am open to your suggestions.
At the end of the day, you will believe what you want to believe as can be seen by last reply. You said that you need to work on yourself. So do it. There are plenty of Asian guys wondering what the big deal is.
ReplyDeleteI can still do both simultaneously. Action + Voice = Progress
ReplyDeleteI've done my part Acting. Now I am Voicing and I think this is what has been traditionally weak and frowned upon in the Asian community.
As stated best by Jaehwan,
Those Amy Tan types are correct–it’s a personal preference...But their right to express a racial preference shouldn’t affect my right to question why that preference exists in such large numbers according to so predictable a trend, nor should it affect my right to discuss the way in which their racial preference affects me or millions of Asian men around the world.
The time for silence is over. We need dialogue.
http://www.avert.org/stdstatisticsworldwide.htm
ReplyDeleteThis report seems to suggest that the rate of STD based on gender differences are similar in North America vs East Asia (slightly higher rates for women in both cases but no where close to 4:1). Nothing to suggest that men are forcing women to have unsafe sex.
I see what both the ladies and the men here are saying. Both sides have valid points, and also some shortfalls in logic.
ReplyDeleteBut no matter what, this kind of back and forth arguing isn't going to solve anything.
The key is to create a larger society-wide event that will set the "tone" for what is permissible and socially acceptable.
If Asian men can achieve this, we won't have to defend our honor and dignity against slights from white men or (certain) Asian women who are perfectly happy to be their slaves for a slice of the white privilege pie.
They will know - that to open their mouths in spite for Asian men - is to invite their condemnation at the hands of the larger society.
The reason certain AFs and some WMs can run amok right now is because that tipping point has not been reached. It's only a matter of time though - they are most definitely living on borrowed time.
In Washinton DC and New York, it is unusual to see an Asian American woman with an AA man. I sometimes wonder if we will even exist in a few generations.
ReplyDeleteAA women dating interracially to make a feminist statement is paradoxical. AA women clearly have more unearned gender privilege in the US than AA men. By dating interracially, AA women are exercising their unearned privilege, and by doing so in such high numbers, they are flaunting it. This high level of interracial dating damages AA male body image, which ironically is a huge issue for feminists. I believe AA women are fortunate to have been born female, which makes me question if traditional feminist theory really applies to Asian Americans.
@ Roger: This quote makes me wonder how bad the imbalance really is.
ReplyDeleteIn Washinton DC and New York, it is unusual to see an Asian American woman with an AA man. I sometimes wonder if we will even exist in a few generations.
What is wrong with us? Why is there so much negativity cast against AA men? I'm willing to take a look at our group including reflecting upon myself before I start immediately pointing fingers, but if its really that bad, we as an AA community need to attack this imbalance from every angle until we restore equilibrium in IR scene.
I believe AA women are fortunate to have been born female, which makes me question if traditional feminist theory really applies to Asian Americans.
I think traditional feminist theory applies to AA women, but I don't see how IR dating is helping their cause. If anything its a regression because they're being categorized as the better "traditional" and "submissive" girlfriend.
Lisa Ling married AA man, Grace Park (Hawaii Five-O) married AA man, you should ask why these amazing women did not fall in with WMs. There isn't any inequality unless you let it on yourself. Am AA woman, I know lots of WMs are jerks, nope never look up just bc of their skin color, that's just for shallow young women. AA men mostly look so unsure of themselves, creepy in my opinion. In America, AA men tried to look like WM, trying to compete, copying their (bad casual) styles, which for me it's kind of fake and weird, In European?Asian big cities Asian men are modern, they groom themselves, a parisian gentleman with asian face, these are one AA men should look up to. What's more important is the personality, the modern charm (you're raised in America!), well spoken, kind and polite, this is a perfect gentleman.
DeleteA couple of decades ago, I published an article on IR marriage, since dating statistics are harder to quantify/qualify. Based on U.S. Census data (again, this was a couple decades ago), there were 3 racial/gender groups that appeared to have a higher-than-average rate of being unmarried or never married. Those were, in order: black women, black men, Asian men. Yes, Asian men were in the top 3.
ReplyDeleteI used to wonder about this. After all, I had an active dating life, and so did most of my Asian male friends. The problem was, and probably still is, that Asian men weren't manning up and gettin' hitched. In fact, most of my close Asian male friends are either unmarried or never been married. Many of them are also in their 40s.
If it seems like I'm judging here, it's because I avoided marriage, for one reason or another, until I was well into my 40s. In the process, I had proceeded to ruin/wreck the lives of Asian and non-Asian women since I first started dating. I can be absolutely certain that I pushed at least 3 Asian women into "never dating another Asian man" as long as they lived.
My point here is that IR dating, as it's being discussed both here and everywhere else, is completely unquantifiable. I like jstele's analogy about the insecure girl and her nose. But to all of us Asian fellas caught up in the frustration, I'd liken it all to a big red pimple. Just leave it alone and stop paying attention to it. It'll eventually pop, pus, and heal. And then you can go back to working on that one girl you've been eye-ing in the cafeteria.
@LT Goto: I am not fond with the idea of just leaving it alone. I've stated this once before. The AA male community neglected this issue for far too long and now look where its gotten us. Not a whole lot of progress but a whole lot of resentment and frustration.
ReplyDeleteA good chunk of AA men sacrificed their social and political well-being by turning a blind eye to the IR dating disparity overemphasizing economic well-being instead. The Booker T. Washington philosophy of simply working harder and keeping quiet only goes so far to improve your image as a minority. That is why Malcom and Martin were such instrumental figures in the changing the social dynamics of America. They actually spoke up which is what we're doing and should be.
The time for change is ripening to fruition. It isn't just me who is raising the level of awareness of this imbalance. There's a nation of us comprised of a flurry combinations of colors, creeds and genders who are seeking improvements in AA male IR relationships and its images.
Asian women have become Uncle Tom, Cum dumpster sellouts for White men. They have no loyalty or pride in their Asian heritage and culture and all wish to be "white" so they can fit in with the majority. White men call them "yellow cabs" because they are a easy cheap ride.
ReplyDelete@JL: I sense your frustration JL but I wouldn't go so far to call them cum dumpster sellouts for White men. That's a little harsh. Being labeled as more catering to the White man? Now you have an argument.
ReplyDeleteAs much as there are Asian women who bash Asian men, there are still some who stand up for us such as the SomeKoreanChick on Xanga. There will always be Asian women who fall victim to the ill-conceived white = wealth or white = power ideal while dissing Asian men. The only thing we can do is fight the power by taking action to improve our image and voicing our opinions against this lopsided trend of A/W couples.
Do you live in NYC or D.C. by any chance? If not, wherever you may be, is the imbalance really so bad to the point that Roger Chan states,
In Washington DC and New York, it is unusual to see an Asian American woman with an AA man.???
So Asian girls with White guys are the case in America as well?
ReplyDeleteI live in Sydney Australia and the White men with Asian women couplings seems to have taken off here in recent years. Out of curiousity I counted when I went into the cbd last saturday and there were 32 confirmed White man with Asian women couples(that is holding hands, kissing, out with their children etc) and 6 unconfirmed.
I counted 2 confirmed White woman Asian man couple and 3 unconfirmed)
Interestingly enough I noted that while some of the White men with Asian women couples were attractive the majority were very average to below average. And although a very limited sample in the Asian men with White women couples the Asian guy could have done much better, these white girls were very much the unnattractive plain jane types while the guy was average to above.
These are just my observations from a 5 hour trip into the city, it does kind of match your points you were making however since I have a girlfriend the ratio doesn't particularly bother me this as well as the hottest asian girls tend to be with asian guys, no one cares about the ugly people anyway ;)
Great blog btw.
@Eddie: Just out of curiosity, how many AM/AF couples were there?
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment!
On that particular day percentage wise my best guess would be around 70% AM/AF couples giving 5% either way. Obviously highly unscientific but just what I saw.
ReplyDeleteThe major difference is between foreign born Asian women and local born Asian women. Foreign born Asian women tend to date Asian men more, most likely due to shared language, culture, lack of english skills, overall compatibility etc.
Australian born Asian women are far more likely to be going out with a White man. So the percentages would again differ between these 2 groups. In which case I would say Australian born Asian women about 50-60% would be AM/AF with foreign born much higher around 90% AM/AF.
Damn, I wished I hadn't read this study. Being an virgin Asian guy, I am going to be fucked, since I am in my 20's. Now if I date an Asian girl who has gone out with whites, I am going to feel bad, since I haven't met too many whites that are kind to Asian guys.
ReplyDeleteNow I have to worry about getting STD's from Asian girls who whore themselve. This is why I will never date an Asian girl who dates whites, it is just too scary the thought of getting STD's. Whites are disease riddened, they wiped a whole population of Native American because of their disease.
interesting posts and comments...
ReplyDeleteAs a WF I think AA guys are good-looking, sexy, smart. And they're often more responsible than their white counterparts.
Nothing to worry about guys. One person out of 5 in this world is "Asian". You're not going to disappear.
The thing is this, Asian women have been conditioned to think that they should be with a white man. The first thing that may stop this is that they may be raised to stay within their own race. However, if they are to deviate out of their race...then it appears that their first choice is to go out with a white man. This really shouldn't bother anybody...to each their own. I will add this though, date whoever you want but what I don't appreciate is an Asian woman trying to put it in my face that white males are better than any other race. We are all people, and I can see why some Asian males would be slightly resentful to such sentiments. My request to Asian females is this, open your minds, your eyes and your hearts to everything in the world...stop living in a little box and letting yourselves be objectified!
ReplyDeleteIts unfortunate when I hear Asian women bashing Asian men when their biological dads and brothers are Asian and then seeing the like displayed in the media.
ReplyDeleteGranted I've done my fair share of criticizing of Asian women, but I don't stop there. I take responsibility for my own actions and look within the Asian male community as well and see what needs improvement. Recently, I've been focusing more on the positive aspects of Asian males while continuously trying to improve on my person.
Open your minds & eyes a bit, fellas. Certain attractive women of any race would love to date you. We are just waiting for you to ask us. It's possible the negative stereotype is standing in your own way, mentally. It may preventing you from being assertive, and even a tad hunter-like. This is what it takes, since most men do not prefer a female who comes on too strong. In the '90s we learned that men like to be the ones to pursue us. I am a tall slender blonde with blue eyes and cute freckles, a bit better than average on the attractiveness scale (per the white guys I've dated). I prefer asian men, but I have trouble meeting them and have never even dated one! This is partly because I don't like dating via the net. Due to subtle mutual flirting over time, a hot asian guy at work noticed me and was interested. For the sake of professionalism, things did not go any further. I'm not looking for a date on here, just hoping you folks will remember this angle in the future.
ReplyDeleteThe sexist stereotype is so false. Asian cultures aren’t hindered by Christian/Jewish religions like White males are, which state that women were to blame in Genesis, that they are 2nd class should serve/obey men, and belong only in the kitchen. In 1950's America men controlled the money and only gave wives small allowances and limited opportunities. This is completely different from “traditional” Asian philosophies. In Confucian cultures women run the families, which includes control of all the money. This is why in East Asia the commercials, TV, & movies are so cutesy/pink/feminine – women are the dominant consumers in Asia, as opposed to America which is male-dominated and has media that caters to men with constant violence/sex/casual relationships. In major East Asian cities (like in China), the husbands do most of the cooking, house cleaning, & child rearing (think about dating supply and demand). East Asian women never change their maiden names in Asia after marriage, in America women need to change their names/identities after marriage. Kids in America generally need their father’s approval for who they marry, in Asia it’s the opposite. China has a higher % of women in politics, compared to the % of female US Congresswomen or US Senators. China has 7 female billionaires, which already make up half the world’s female billionaires, even though China is still poor and their economy is only 1/5 that of America.
ReplyDeleteYou can only hide the truth for so long – people are beginning to realize that Western media, especially as it pertains to Asian men, is extremely racist/distorted & is designed to help White males who are extremely insecure & extremely supremacist/territorial.
In dating (which includes interracial dating), it's always up to the female to accept a guy's advances or not. It doesn't matter how much many males have an Asian fetish.
ReplyDeleteThis Asian female/White-male phenomenon is very simple:(1) White worship & self-loathing, and (2) Various Asian cultures are still ingrained with Confucian values which obsess over prestige, status, hierarchy, and brands. Look at how many Asians are obsessed with what college their kids get into, what car/clothing brands they buy, or starving for months to save up for overpriced handbags. It’s no surprise why the most avid consumers of Euro fashion products are actually Asians, not Europeans. Same goes for diamonds or gold, shiny symbols of status and prestige, the biggest consumers of overpriced jewelry are Asians.
This directly plays into dating too, Asian people in Asia & America are brainwashed by media which globally is very Western/Caucasian-centric. In Asia the commercials, malls, ads, and movie theaters glorify Caucasian faces the vast majority of the time. It’s no surprise why eyelid and nose ridge surgery, to emulate Caucasian looks, are the #1 surgery in Asia.
Think about how lucrative/effective the multi-billion dollar advertising industry is. Then think about how effective product placement is on TV or movies. Entertainment is just as effective in ‘branding’ various males, just like product placement. Western media repeatedly ‘brands’ White males as the best, while simultaneously marginalizing Asian males or giving them outright racist or demeaning roles. Asian women (and other women) internalize this about White & Asian men. Many prestige-obsessed Asian women thus see dating White males (even extremely low quality ones) as a weird status trophy. Some (like Michelle Malkin) go so far as to say self-racist things, or denigrate their own people, for approval from certain supremacist Whites. The Uncle Tom behavior is despicable.
White worship, self-loathing, obsession for status/prestige, & media-brainwashing help explain why you see so many Asian women in Asia, and in America, with low quality White males who anyone can see on any city sidewalk represent the bottom of the barrel, a combination of fat/old/ugly/bald, or extremely weird/awkward White males who oftentimes simultaneously harbor closet racist views toward Asian cultures & Asian males, while also having extremely negative, bitter (and sexist) views toward White women.
Of course, there will be more Asian women with STD's as opposed to Asian men. Why? Because there is no great demand for MALE prostitutes. I'm sure a lot of the women who have STD's are prostitutes. Only 10% of Asian women have STD's, so you are going to generalize that to ALL Asian women? Some STD's can be acquired in other ways like through drug use or blood transfusions, so the percentage is not only a reflection of sexual behavior.
ReplyDeleteSome Asian guys need to be more assertive in asking a girl out. That is why they get less dates, period.
ReplyDelete@jstele
ReplyDeleteYou do have a valid argument there. I will expand on this topic in a later blog post.
Good discussion.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to throw a few facts into the mix.
Fact 1: I speak Mandarin fluently and am friends with many AAs of my dad's generation. (They are in their 50s.) In regards to racial preference for their kid's future spouses, Asians are obviously ok. However, putting Asians aside, many of them do have a bias for white spouses over latinos and blacks.
Fact 2: The concept of "face" is alive and well in the AA community, perhaps to a larger degree than in other minority communities. As another poster mentioned: it's all about the Ivy League degree, the nice car, the proper job/profession and the right address.
My tentative conclusion from these two facts is the following: AAs have a conception of what reality is in their head. And that reality places latinos and blacks below Asians and whites on the socioeconomic ladder. Since Asians care about "face", undoubtedly many will attempt to emulate "whiteness" through many different methods, one of which will be to date out/marry out. This is easier for AFs because they are not viewed as a "threat" by white society. Women in general, for better or worse, for right or wrong, almost never are considered a threat in any society, in any time frame.
Men are killed in war, women are taken in war.
Thus, AMs should indeed work on their own game. They should stick together and realize that reality is subjective - they should work to create their own sphere of what is real. (I'm echoing the comments of a previous poster here.)
I submit these these vastly simplified comments for everyone's consideration.
What upsets me is hearing my WM friends joke and laugh about how easy it is to "nail" an Asian American woman. They say the magic phrase to use is "I'm looking to settle down" and the typical Asian American woman's panties instantly hit the floor. Of course after a few sessions, days, weeks or months she gets dumped.
ReplyDeleteThere certainly is some truth to this "theory" if were gonna call it that! I'm a Blackman & I have dated & or just bedded my share of Asian Women, not because it's a "fetish", but because that's just who I'm attracted too! I can say this much! As a Blackman I feel you can certainly pull an Asian woman, but you gottta cast a LARGE NET just to get one, because they gernerally don't swing our way! When having this convo with White males for the ones that are into asian chicks & for the ones not so much they both say the same thing! & I quote one such guy! "For a White Guy fucking Asian chicks is like shooting fish in a barrel!" And this guy was into "Latinas".
ReplyDeleteAwesome post Masir Jones...absolutely awesome.
ReplyDelete“Asian and Pacific Islander women also have broader interracial dating patterns than Asian American men. This might explain why these women are exposed to higher rates of STDs.”
ReplyDeleteThat second sentence should be rephrased to: "This definitely explains why these women..."
It is logically impossible for Asian women to have so many more STDs than Asian men without go outside of the race much more frequently.
The asian AMERICAN women have had the same upbringing and asian american men and they are definitely NOT VICTIMS of other people's power.
ReplyDeleteSame poster as the last two (anon)
@Anonymous (the last two)
ReplyDeleteI agree with your argument.
As I mentioned in my blog, just for shits and giggles go onto Craigslist and run a search in the "Women 4 Men" section. Type in the word "Asian" and see how many SAF are seeking out SWMs only. You'll be surprised (or not given the current trend). In fact, I think its unfair to say that its a one-way street that only white men can have an Asian fetish.
It's pretty hypocritical how these white-worshiping Asian women go around saying that they don't like guys who have an Asian fetish, yet only want to date white guys because that's ALL they're attracted to.
What the heck do they think a fetish is?
@MaSir Jones
ReplyDeleteCompletely agree with you.
White Man Fetish is a term that Asian men need to start applying.
Unprotected sex won't lead to a STD infection unless YOUR PARTNER HAS AN STD. Unwanted pregnancy maybe, but not an STD.
ReplyDeleteSince Asian men are so clean, Asian women are clearly getting these STDs from non-Asian men. This is indisputable fact!
What is even more troubling is that Asian women have higher STDs than white women. This means that Asian women are sleeping around with not the average non-asian man, but they are doing it with the dirtest, most perverted of the bunch.
YUCK is right.
@MaSir Jones
ReplyDeleteIn response to what you said:
"It's pretty hypocritical how these white-worshiping Asian women go around saying that they don't like guys who have an Asian fetish, yet only want to date white guys because that's ALL they're attracted to.
What the heck do they think a fetish is?"
I'm an AAF, and completely agree with the stats about AF/WM couples, but it is simplistic to imply that there is not a spectrum within the WM population of how racist they are. On one hand you have WM who will tell me to my face that they "prefer Asian women because of their cultural values and traditionality..." (aka SUBMISSIVENESS), and on the other hand, WM who are attracted to me despite the fact that I am a loudmouth radical feminist, and not remotely submissive.
I'm definitely not defending the white guys (I personally wouldn't even date one) but don't downplay the disgusting ways that WM fetishize us.
Another thing people haven't brought up is the influence of American media. The "hot guys" are always white, and tell me, when was the last time you saw an AF/AM couple kiss on TV or in an American film??? This is incredibly important! AAFs are not the sole reason for this discrepancy, this entire country has been brainwashed to emasculate AM and see them as a not even /remotely/ possible mate.
As a result, we now have Asian guys who are in-your-face machismo trying to compensate for these stereotypes, and bitter guys who take it out on women from their own community...
-a
@Anonymous AAF:
ReplyDeleteI agree with your assessment.
In fact, looking at this post from a while back is quite embarrassing to me, because all I see is a bitter soul. It's not to say that my arguments are without merit, but it's just one rant after another bashing the women that I love so much.
A lot of it is driven by the American media and its unfortunate, but that just means AMs have to perform. We have to hustle and game smarter and harder and support our Asian-American sisters.
Thanks for visiting and shedding light on such a dark and bitter topic.
all i can say is if asian women are meant to be smarter and more intelligent then australian women why the hell are aussie women independant, with high flying careers of their own and why are asian women scabbing off australian husbands ova the internet and prostituting themselves for a visa obviously their iq is much lower then westerner women
ReplyDeleteAAM-in-so-cal said:
ReplyDeleteWell, yay for studies that highlight disturbing trends. But did we really need it? Aside from the TV and the cinema, take a trip to the entries starting with "Asian" at urbandictionary.com. Here you find the current culture at its unfiltered best (at least the screen still has to conform to certain standards lest some loudmouth Hollywood liberal start an argument!), and unsurprisingly, the dictionary is rife with AM emasculation, AF exotification and promiscuity, small penises, "Ching-Chong", slant-eyes, etc. When we AM go for a night on the town, do you think our prospects are basing their criteria on academic research papers on gender and racial (in)equality they've recently read? No way.
And don't pin it up to "traditional values" and so forth, or lack of "game". The plain fact is, many culturally influenced AAFs *are* willing to be subservient--just not to us AAMs. Even when that's not what we want--I and all the AAMs I know are as progressive as one could be. We encourage women of all colors to embrace their own personhood and develop their own careers. We can cook and clean after ourselves. AND, in particular, completely open to dating any race. Sure, some traditionalist stragglers remain, but it is mostly confined to the immigrants of decades ago (and think: was it any better for WF that long ago?). It is easy to slap the traditionalist label on us because we are "foreign" and modern American culture's understanding of us Asians is simply out of date. And how could it not be, with all the media stereotypes? How would you feel about participating in a rigged game? Not very good, I bet.
Here in Southern California, dating is difficult. I see AF/WM couples multiple times per day, while it takes weeks, or even months, to see the opposite pairing. AF/AM couples are common too, but still, there is something wrong about the disparity especially given our openness. I had the chance to be the change I wanted to see, and dated a WF for some time... but she simply stopped it in its tracks due to a lack of "chemistry". I thought we'd hit it off pretty well, but I feel that the thought of me as a fully sexual human being simply was something she refused to accept. I finally did succeed, with an AF, and some days I still wish I could be the "mold-breaker," as I call it. But I do love her, and so the only thing I can do now is at least realize my work is not done, and help my AAM brothers here. I can't rest on my laurels.
"Well, by saying........"Condom use is hard in a culture where women are raised to be accommodating and polite.”....she's basically saying that Asian women's lack of assertiveness when it comes to insisting on safe sex with non-Asian men, may result from their being taught subservience in their own cultures. In other words, the Asian patriarchy is to blame - or, simply, Asian men are the culprits."
ReplyDeleteI read it as they're simply more accommodating to go condomless when they're dating outside their own ethnicity. In other words, they value the non-Asian man enough to put their own future in jeopardy through unwanted pregnancy or STDs.
If that wasn't the case, you need to ask yourself why they have the STDs in the first place... obviously because they will do whatever it takes to hold on to a non-Asian guy.
Another good reason not to date AF, since they shamelessly take the privileges of being an Asian woman, while exercising the privileges of being equal...
I've always suspected that Asian women who date non-Asian men are whores.
ReplyDeleteNow I have scientific proof.
There are very well made journal articles on the nature of sexual colonization and the expectations / stereotypes that are created by it.
ReplyDeleteIn the end, the society that produces and out-thinks and outinnovates and out-negotiates the others gets to do what they want. The West is not only industrious, but they use communication as a weapon, their culture to entice, and heated debate to self-analyze and improve. The West is lagging for now, but if other societies cannot excel past these strengths the West will continue to do what it wants -- and that includes creating an environment where its position as a sexual ruler is maintained.
Let's be blunt.
ReplyDeleteThis is a kind of war that Asian males are in.
White males in particular (and some other non-White males to a degree) are the enemy.
You either fight back, or you will be conquered.
The reason why American culture feels like it can punk AMs in terms of everything from pop culture (like urban dictionary) to sex is because, many AMs are gutless and simply refuse to fight back.
Instead, they offer bullshit alibis and excuses for racism, turn the other cheek, spout pollyannish "racial harmony" nonsense, or worst of all try to become Whiter than Whites.
In America, turning the other cheek is suicidal behavior.
If someone hits you, then hit them back.
If White people disrespect your culture and identity, then give them a taste of their own medicine.
That's the only thing they understand. The only thing.
http://whitewatch.info/
Asian women at least in America want the white cock more than the Asian cock and that's the main issue. All studies that come on this topic just reinforce that point.
ReplyDeleteUntil this is dealt with this will never be resolved and will only get worse
More Asian women are cohabiting with white men than with Asian men and its treated as normal. Whats with that?
The only response I've seen thus far is on YouTube with videos like "look here is an Asian guy with a white girl" which ironically has the opposite effect and makes Asian guys look lamer. There has to be another way
@Dealing with this
ReplyDeleteThe other way is to go out and talk to women instead of thinking about it all day like I used to. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Having traveled to a few of these countries and interacting with several East and South-East Asians, my impression is Asian girls are indeed easy, at least for me!
ReplyDeleteNow I'm not an unattractive guy. Even in India where I live, I'm able to draw in a lot of Indian women with nothing more than a warm, affectionate smile but there are still many bitchy types who won't give me a second glance because they're obviously not attracted to my physique. In fact, I'm a shy guy and in India that's a turn-off.
But when it comes to Asian countries, I've always been pleasantly received by the opposite sex. In Taiwan, I couldn't believe what I saw, the girls that I found extremely attractive would approach me directly to have their pictures clicked with me - they found a lot of exotic appeal. In Japan where they apparently don't like Indian men coz the stereotype goes we're all ugly, dirty and smelly, I had to practically beat away female stalkers who given a chance could have raped me...it was a real life Axe effect. Despite so many chances, I passed them because I don't like to sleep around although I did yield to the temptation on occasions. I really felt like the God Adonis and the Asian girls not having enough of me.
I had several Indian male colleagues and they never enjoyed even a fraction of attention as I did. Most girls were attracted to my shy and quiet nature as opposed to my brash and pompous Indian colleagues because being loud is the norm here. Another reason which a girl told me, I don't look typically Indian but somewhat Asian in appearance....which is false but because I wear glasses and have a round, oval face some people may have the false impression I may have some "Chinese" in me.
Asian girls are definitely going for Indian guys as well now. This leads me to believe its not the white skin these girls are into but they are into the Caucasian look, that is more angular facial features. A lot of Asian girls believe a mixed child will be more attractive than a pure Asian kid, so this seems to drive them seeking anyone who isn't an Asian guy.
ReplyDeleteRegarding Interracial couple numbers after White guys with Asian girls the second most popular couple would be Indian guys with Asian girls. I see at least 2 of these pairs a day.
I have to wonder if anyone who has read this misinformation has actually done any follow-up research of Mr. Hyeouk Hahm’s ‘study.’ His data sources are from 95′ and 01′.
ReplyDeleteAccording to the CDC (data from 2010), Asian American women collectively have lower rates of STD infection than white women, across the board. The only exceptions are with HIV, in which they have the same likelihood of infection as white women; and also for The Clap (and I don’t know why) amongst Asian women 35+. Perhaps they are foreigners, I don’t know.
So there you have it. Straight from the CDC.
But really, ladies…. (as someone who is sexually active, and not ashamed of it, and yes I’ve slept w/ both white and Asian guys) Put a wrapper on it, and go get tested regularly (if you’re sexually active). There’s no shame in protecting yourselves… And don’t be afraid to be choosy amongst the men that hit on you.
Amen! Wrap it up!
ReplyDeleteThis article obviously states the truth. We can sit here and talk about why, how, where, who or whatever... but the truth is, Asian women have higher STD rates because they sleep with a lot more white men, simple as that. whites are still the majority, asians are the smallest minority... and if AF/WM couples make up a huge percentage of the interracial dating population, this will lead you to the huge disproportionate number of Asian women sleepin with white men. Im a asian guy, and I do not date or associate with asian women that even hang out with white men. Even before this article I used to think...
ReplyDelete1) white people are a lot more promiscuous then asians
2) so if a asian girl sleeps with a white guy, there is a greater chance for the asian girl to contract a std
3) if a asian girl dates white men, since she probably wants to be white, she will be promiscuous like white men also, therefore she will have a higher chance of havin a STD
Hahaha, I was right all along I guess.
Us asian men do not have to change anything about ourselves and cater to these sellout cum dumps. The worse thing an Asian man could do is to look for something wrong within himself to answer for as to why these sellout women flock to these racist white men. If you are a Asian man, and at some point decide to date or marry a sellout thats been with a racist white man THAT IS WHEN you lose your manhood, NOT because these women insist on havin themselves passed from one pig to the other and blame it on the Asian man.
ReplyDeleteMaybe Asians need to stop glorifying light skin and the problem would diminish. The same reason Asians don't date blacks and other dark skinned folks is the same reason AM are losing their women to whites. If people are valued based on the lightness of their skin tone, then obviously whites will always be atop the social and dating ladder, as per your own value system. This is why I have never understood anti-black racism in the Asian community, because it is tacit admission that you are inferior to whites. And in the dating world, you want the best possible mate so if you can get what you perceive as good, you will take it. It's called a free market. If you think this problem is unrelted to your dislike of blacks, you're dead wrong. Remember your skin tone is in the middle, so obviously the preference in your community will always be whites first, then Asians, then darker groups, then blacks. Ergo, your women choose mates in that order.
ReplyDeleteNot all but a lot of Asian women think themselves as inferior to whites. Sort of self-imposed racial bias without any basis. Chinese are probably the worst. So, a lot of Asian women will just sleep with ny white skin. BTW, the white guy better not catch STD.
ReplyDeleteAsian Women are just plain whores.. Especially for a white guy.... They have this belief more like hangup about elevating their status by being with a white guy...and they don't care if they are married either. They are huge gold diggers And they're manipulative bitches that do everything you want but at what cost? They start to nag and bitch and really aren't that good looking after a couple of years...many of ugly as hell with horrible bodies... I finally realize better to dump them since they really sleep around too much. In college (not proud about it now) but we would bet how quickly we could bed the same chick... Easiest lay were Asians especially if talk about dad's yacht or Maserati. Quite often our group 8 hit them back to back... We use to say " I was swimming with your fish". Condoms hell no only if I insisted cus I didn't like swimming with my buddies fish.. Talk about nasty they rarely clean up between guys... I shudder now I didn't get anything from those bitches. And FYI we had and Asian and Latino in our mix...at first we saw them struggle until they learned the right lines... I know not cool but consider it to a sociology experiment. But to answer the main question yes Asian women are easy and they are not tight as the stereotype says..I had tiny petite Asians girl that you could park a Mack truck in... Mediterranean are the tightest and cleanest.. Spain, Italy Greece..
ReplyDeleteIt happens all too often that a guy comes back from a date telling his friends that he thinks it went really well, just to find out a few days or weeks later than the woman hasn't agreed to going out with him again. He often wonders where he went wrong, thinking back to the conversations he had on his date.
ReplyDeleteI know it’s kind of late, but this STI stuff about AAW is serious and I think is still very current. Fact (sounding kind of redundant since MaSir Jones has already mentioned it), AAW are not stupid, many are educated — formally or informally. AAW, especially those that had any kind of schooling here know about STIs and, at the very least, the prudence and purpose of using a condom. Whether or not AAW always use good judgment before having sex is not unlike what other women of other groups go through. However, if Professor Hahm’s study is any indication that what was may still be what is and what will continue to be, then community health service organization(s) need to be more active in educating AAW about STIs and the preventative measures needed to be taken. Thankfully, according to CDC 2010 overall STDs for AAW seem to be dropping. Bottomline: From all the rather strong comments, the social and health issues presented here for discussion are probably sorely needed. One more thing, for those Asian guys who are miffed about some AAW’s preferences of a particular sexual partner, I have just one thing to say — this is America and in America women (and men) can choose who they want to go to bed with. Now the reasoning behind why they choose one kind of man over another is another topic altogether. We all need to remember, America is a beautiful country and it is a free country. Just leave AAW alone and let them be happy with whomever they choose to be with.
ReplyDeleteWhy is any non-Asian assumed to be a white guy anyway? My sister's always had the hots for middle eastern men...
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dw_mRaIHb-M#t=63
ReplyDeleteamen
ReplyDeleteNo amount of thinking can overcome the female hamster...
ReplyDelete