I believe Better Asian Man has stated it best,
What I realized after my transition period is that even if all negative media portrayals of Asian American men were replaced with good ones, and even if all white male romantic leads were replaced with Asian American male romantic leads tomorrow morning, that still wouldn’t produce any tangible result for my romantic life. Even if all of that stuff I was “fighting” against went away, I would STILL have to learn how to get good with women and make myself into a better man.This is one of those simple, yet harsh realities that I refused to acknowledge quite frequently. I would make excuses or justify my shortcomings by placing blame on residual factors such as the media or entertainment in hopes that somebody else would pave the way for me so I could just ride their coat tails. That kind of mindset has zero positive impact on my personal development and is an amalgamation of whining (unattractive) and laziness (also unattractive) in its purest form.
Imagine if a CEO of a Fortune 500 company, let alone any company for that matter, operated in a similar fashion. If the CEO went on a diatribe about how the government and his competition have an unfair advantage every quarterly earnings release instead of reaching out for help by hiring the right resources and executing on a well thought out strategy, that person wouldn't be CEO for long and would eventually fall off in the corporate world. The dating world is no different from the corporate and it shouldn't be.
To each and every one of you who have posted on my blog, contender or defender, I wish for all of your forthcoming holidays to be filled with joy, peace and brighter days ahead.
Happy New Year, Masir! Don't be so down on yourself, dude. keep focusing on the bright spots and build on them. It's hard to do, but if you keep at it, then you'll get the hang of it. it takes daily practice.
ReplyDeleteThis doesn't mean ignoring shit and not calling out racist BS. Acknowledge but don't dwell on it.
Thanks for the support James.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I've started to take a look at the brutal facts in regards to my personal shortcomings. Every time I feel like I've done a decent job of holding myself accountable, I always manage to find some excuse to legitimize my weaknesses OR be in complete denial of reality. This topic goes above and beyond the dimensions of "The Game". It encompasses successes versus failures in life as whole.
To your point though, in no way am I turning a blind eye toward racism. You can bet on that.