For some reason a couple of days ago my blog was down for an entire day so I couldn't post the 2nd part of my guest writer's piece. Thankfully it was merely a glitch of some sort on Google's part (at least I hope it was). Anyway, continuing with DL's piece...I bring you
Keep it on the DL: Dating Non-Asian Girls: Part II,
All of this is a roundabout preface to discussing my own experiences with dating, interracial dating in particular because I've never dated an East Asian girl and the majority of girls I've dated have been White. As I mentioned before, I am Chinese, I'm not very tall (5'7”), and until very recently, I've never had much money. Both my parents are janitors and I put myself through college working as a bus driver and a line cook. However, none of those things was ever a real obstacle in my love life. Yes, I know that height, race, money, and social status matter to some girls, but our own insecurities about those things often hold us back more than the girls' concerns about them.
Once, after I had kissed a girl good night, she said, “Hey, are you shorter than me?” I said, “Probably, I'm not that tall. Is that a problem for you?” She said, “No, is it for you? Some guys freak out over stuff like that. I dated a guy once who got really upset when he found out that I make more money than he does.” Of course, I didn't care at all about our height and wealth disparities. In fact, I like dating girls who are within two inches of my height in either direction. You don't have to adjust your car seat and mirrors when you drive each other's cars. Also, it makes having sex while standing much easier!
What this means is that you should try to put race out of your mind in the dating scene. If you see a cute girl making eyes at you, don't doubt yourself because she's White or Black or some other race that you don't think could ever be into Asians, or taller than you or whatever, just go for it. The worst thing she can do is turn you down and even in that situation, you end up with an amusing and embarrassing story to tell your friends.
Most of the girls I've been with have told me that I'm the first Asian guy they have ever dated, not because they aren't into Asians but because Asian guys never approach them. Race has only rarely come up at all. A few years ago, I was on a road trip with one of my former girlfriends and when we stopped for gas, she asked me, “Do you feel like people are staring at us? Why is everyone looking over here?” I shrugged, “Maybe because we’re an interracial couple.” She started laughing, “Oh my God! We ARE!” It mattered so little to her that we were of different races that the fact that other people noticed it caught her off guard.
To Be Continued...
